Just had a new year's eve steamboat dinner at boyfriend's auntie's house. A nice cosy new year's eve. So different from the norm. I probably expect myself to be somewhere partying. Never will I thought I'll spend my new year's eve like that. Actually I do expect a quieter new year's eve... Together with the boyfriend of course. Oh well. Mousey is sitting on my lap as I blog. The plus point of tonight will be being able to see baby Ethan again. Too cute. Haha. Didn't get to carry him though. Aww. Hope to see baby Ethan again. It's nice hanging out with Jaslyn too.
Was rushing to Aunty Hazel's house like crazy cos I wanted to FaceTime love before he left his friend's hostel. I was about to head out when he woke up and he was going to FaceTime his mum first. So happy to catch him. It doesn't matter how sweaty I am and how messy my hair is as long as I can talk to him:DD
So happy to FaceTime love at 12am for about half an hour last night too^^ We knew each other one year ago. Midnight of 30th, early 31st. The night I'll never forget. I guess no one expect us to go so far. He is my first ever serious boyfriend. The first boy that see so much in me and treats me right. I am glad to start 2011 with Alvin. I grew up a lot this year. I discovered a lot about myself this year that I'll never think I'll ever would. I am someone with really low self esteem and I can never see myself doing great in anything. He made me believe that I am actually something. I haven't felt so strongly for someone for a long time. In fact, I have never ever placed so much trust on someone before. Still remember how I told my friends that I'll never give my whole heart to anyone, not even the boyfriend, cos I was so afraid of getting hurt again. Everyone will hurt you someday. I guess I couldn't take another massive heartbreak again then. I just take things as they go and didn't see us going too far. It's just too hard to believe. After we officially started going out as a couple, I was still filled with lots of insecurities. That made me really sad. Alvin isn't like any ideal or probably the usual caring boyfriend. He won't suddenly appear at your school or doorstep to surprise you or walk you to school or walk you home. I know I shouldn't compare him to anyone but he is just not that kinda boyfriend. He was busy all the time and think that things are enough when they aren't. Just a sense of insecurity all the time. I was sad cos I thought we weren't gonna last. But things totally turnaround after the Phu Quoc trip seeing how much he's willing to do to make sure I am safe, to protect me and all that he wants was to make me happy. I guess our relationship really took a turn from there. He has been really nice to me all these while. Better every single day. The amount of time we spent this whole semester is too much. I learnt how to rely on him and I grew too attached to him. Things just isn't the same without him. He is probably the only one who can call me sweetie and baby without causing me goosebumps. He is the first person that I can see in my life in future. It's 2012 now. How I wish I can hug him now. Hmmm. I can't live without him now. Life won't be living cos you are the one I couldn't live without.
My results suffered a lot in 2011 despite the great amount of effort I put into my studies but I am sure 2012 will be better. School wise, I am really thankful to have Huihui around. I was so disorganised in Year 1. Huihui taught me how to be more organised though I still can't help dozing off in class cos I was too tired:( Next sem will be better cos I need to wake up early to FaceTime so I will probably sleep early and study early in the morning:) Hope in 2012 our results won't disappoint us anymore. In 2011, I am still thankful to God that my besties are still my besties. Always there for me when I needed someone.
Alright. Abrupt stop but glad that I am home to countdown with my family in front of the TV for the new year ahead. I do have resolutions but I am probably not going to blog about them. No matter what, you guys have to agree with me that my 2012 will not start awesome.
Will I still be able to see you? When can I ever hold you again?
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